I’m officially closer to 30 than 20, my birthday was last Sunday and I’m getting old at 26. Or it feels that way at least, I know I’m still young. But it just reminds me how fast time is running, and how quickly things seem to happen anymore. I remember being a kid and feeling like I had so much time in the world. I don’t feel that way anymore. Instead, it feels like I’m losing so much time.
My birthday was nice, though. When I look back at where C and I were last year, it really is amazing how much things can change. I honestly think my problem is there’s been so much change since we’ve gotten together. Not in a bad way, but they’ve been big changes.
I’m thankful for the people in my life who have offered me a place to stay and helped me out. But after a certain point, you start to wonder who’s helping who out more. You start to feel as though you get taken advantage of or overlooked.
This insomnia bullshit is getting in the way of my best sleep. All I do is toss and turn all night trying to get comfortable. Doesn’t work. I can’t fall asleep fast enough and then I get too hot and have to turn again. On top of that, the baby is active a lot more when I’m laying down. While I love feeling him move, it makes it rather hard to get comfortable or fall asleep.
Life has been way too busy for me lately, time has been flying by so quickly, and I’m less than 11 weeks away from my due date. They say the last trimester goes by slowly, but there’s so much I have to get done that it feels like time has just been moving too quickly for me to enjoy it.
We’ve been living with my friend, B, for almost a month already, which is crazy to me. Time felt so weird when we were living with C’s friends. We were in this weird in between stage with them, and now that we’re here, we’re in crunch time really. I want to get our own place by September 1st. But it honestly doesn’t feel that far away anymore. We’re almost to August and my only hopeful prospect for a place was one that I looked at a couple hours ago.
Time is flying by so quickly these days, I can’t keep up with writing everything down. I think this is the longest break I’ve taken from this blog since I started it back up. Where I had too much time before, I just don’t have the same luxury anymore. Or a computer, still. It’s harder doing everything off of my phone.
Anyways! Long time no see. I left my last post stressed out, and while things are still hectic and crazy, a lot has also changed in this new year.
I’m a dreamer. I’ve always been. Maybe it’s why I’m so passionate about change but so afraid to embrace it. Uprooting my life has been hard. It’s a change I worked for, busted my ass for – and I know it’s going to work out and things will be okay! – but by God, it’s fucking killing me.
I’ve had so much free time on my hands, I don’t even know what to do with myself right now. Why is it that we have the most time when we don’t have money to do anything?
Netflix and Hulu decided to draw money out of my account at the same time. I wasn’t even thinking, I would’ve been okay, but I spent $12 at Sunoco and with the $20 deducted on top of that? My $15 turned into -$57 after the overdraft fee was added in.
Hey guys, long time no see. Things have been so hectic! Let me tell you, I moved, and it was the biggest shit show of a move. Never again. The next time we move, I’m giving myself at least a week before we need to be out. Because this shit was awful.
So my last update I had just quit my job, and we had one day to be out. Well, they let us know they wouldn’t actually be there until 8:30 AM Wednesday morning, so it gave us a little more time.
Time has been flying by so. damn. fast. I seriously cannot keep up with it anymore. It feels like it’s been a lot of me fighting lately, fighting to get out of this situation I’ve felt stuck and cooped up in. But I’ve also been at a standstill, waiting for things to change, for something to move.