In a lot of ways, I feel like most of my life I’ve had nothing but setbacks. Goals for the future that were put off by someone else, or just never achieved. And you know what? It flat out sucks. Bad. Because the more setbacks in your life, the more you start to feel as if nothing is going to happen.
So how do you get past that feeling? How do you keep moving forward when everything is going wrong? Perseverance. Hope. Strength.
Set goals for yourself.
Yes, you may not achieve all of them, but it gives you a start. By setting goals, you’re giving yourself something to aim for. Start small, even if it’s something simple such as making yourself eat breakfast or taking 5 minutes out of the day just to breathe. Do it. Start now.
The problem is, it’s hard to maintain a routine when life knocks you down. Keeping up with something is difficult, it really is. When I stop and think about the fact that I graduated college almost two years ago and I’m doing nothing with my degree? It depresses me. When I think about the fact that not only am I still living at home, but I’m working at a restaurant and cashiering? What am I doing with my life?
We get ourselves used to what we know – it’s our comfort zone. Moving forward is hard, you don’t know what’s out there, and figuring out your future? It’s impossible. But, the older I get the one thing I’m realizing is this: The only person who can change your circumstance and happiness is YOU. You’re the only person who knows exactly what you need to do, and you have the tools to overcome the setback of being stuck.
What is life without risks? Do you really want to waste more time in a job that you’re unhappy doing, surrounded by bad influences and excuses to drink your life away? No. Who the hell wants that? Don’t you want to make something of yourself? You deserve to. Yes, it’s hard, it wouldn’t be worth it if it were easy.
What do youwant out of life? Are you going to keep letting setbacks hold you back? No, that relationship didn’t work out, and maybe your goals are rearranged now. That one thing you were looking forward to? Got cancelled, too? Life keeps knocking you down, money can’t stay in the bank because everything is an expense and it’s sucking it right out of you. Change it. Do something about it. Start with your mind frame.
Things take time.
When I graduated college, I had all of these goals to move to Pittsburgh and start my life. It didn’t happen. Instead, I got stuck in a couple of minimum wage bullshit jobs, and then I found my current job. And as much as it’s stressing me out now, it’s also helped me find my voice and build myself up. I met some crazy people, and I made some friends. Honestly, 90% of the people I know now, I know they won’t stay in my life. It’s just how life works. But… for now, it’s nice going into work and having people be genuinely happy to see you and going out later to drink with them. Good vibes.
Starting my job, it took me forever to get myself on track. See, as much as I wanted to get my life started, I had nothing saved up for it, and I was in no way prepared for it. In the last two years, I’ve built my credit up over 100 points, to the place where I went from bad credit to good credit. I’ve started putting money aside, and amazingly enough, have money built up in my savings account. It’s not a crazy amount, but it’s a start! And this year alone, I’ve started making moves to get things done and accomplished. Maybe it would’ve gotten done had I moved out earlier on, but focusing on the things you can’t change now does not help improve your situation.
Focus on now, not the past.
Not just that, focus on finding the positives in every situation. Life is rough, but there are still good things. We focus so much on the negatives that we don’t look back on the things that made us who we are today. The people who we think broke us, didn’t break us – they toughened us. People who you thought would be there forever – they left their mark, but life goes on. Didn’t do the things you wanted? There’s still time. Work towards it now, stop letting people and jobs and everything in general hold you back.
If you want, make it happen.
For so long, I’ve let setbacks hold me back. No more. So, together, if you’ve got something holding you back – Stop. You can change your situation, and granted, some people have really tough situations to move forward from, but still, you can do it.
Let’s find some motivation together ❤