We’re almost halfway through September already, which is crazy. 2018 is just around the corner. Can time just slow down a little? I feel like I barely got to enjoy the summer weather before it started turning cooler again. I’m not ready for the cold weather, not one bit.
I mentioned about a week ago (here) about trying to make some goals for this week.
My weekly goal from now to next week is going to include: cleaning up a little around the house (and especially my bedroom – it’s a disaster), read half of Game of Thrones, finish Twin Peaks (before my free Showtime on Hulu expires), and especially – call and set up a doctor’s appointment! This is the first step to getting my act together.
Good news is, I’ve made some of them! Yesterday, I called and finally set up a doctor’s appointment. It’s two weeks from now, which is not too bad for being a new patient. The one doctor I had signed up for a couple years ago, they had a two month wait for new patients (ridiculous). Now, after that appointment, I have to go to the DMV to sign up to try for my learner’s permit again.
It’s a bit frustrating still having to have that despite being 24. But the one I have expired two years ago and they told me I have to redo everything again basically. Yet online it says you don’t need a learner’s permit – but wait, if you don’t have your license, never mind, yes, you do need it. Such a tease! You can only schedule a road test online, which sucks. So I have to sit at the DMV for an hour just to take the test? What joys to look forward to again. Plus my State ID is expiring on Halloween so I’m not only going to have to pay for a drivers’ license, I’m going to have to pay for a State ID now, too.
On the plus side, I have a really good friend, Bob, who offered to come up and take me driving to get my permit. He even was okay with helping me get comfortable driving to and around Pittsburgh. So I’m excited! The sooner I get comfortable driving, the sooner I can get my license and a car and get out on my own out there.
The other thing I managed to accomplish is finishing up Twin Peaks: The Return. It was a great show, I mentioned my thoughts here.
Two out of Four isn’t too bad, right? I did read some of Game of Thrones, but I’m not halfway through it yet. And I did some cleaning, but my bedroom is still a disaster. But the most important thing was scheduling that appointment, so I think I can be okay with how things have gone!
Honestly, my work schedule is awful the rest of the week – reasons why I’m posting about this now. I know I’m not going to accomplish much the rest of the week, I’m looking at over 30 hours the next four days. While I’ll still post my daily posts, everything else is going to basically get set back for work.
I wanted to get myself started on a photography challenge to work on my photography skills, but I think I’m going to hold off on starting that until I figure out where I’m going. See, I just applied to a couple of bank jobs. My mom’s best friends’ daughter works at one uptown, and she offered to refer me and be my reference. I’m over my current job (as I keep saying here and here).
Plus the other thing is my health insurance is something I get free through the state. I qualified for it last year because I didn’t make enough money. Now, I have 45 hours this week and I’m making a dollar more than I did last year. I have to resubmit my pay stubs in the next month, and I just don’t think I’ll qualify anymore. I’m making too much. My job now offers no benefits. Banks, however, offer eye, dental, health and a 401K retirement plan. I need to start looking into this.
The shifts would be 8am-5pm Monday through Friday, and weekends off. I wouldn’t be on my feet constantly like I am at work now, too. This is yet another reason – I stand on hard cement for 9 hours sometimes, I run back and forth, and my shoes get ruined very fast so I stopped buying new ones. It’s hard on my feet, in fact it may be ruining them.
Ultimately, though, I just don’t even like the job anymore. I like some customers, others I can’t stand seeing. And sometimes I see the ones I can’t stand, like two or three times a shift and everyday. Why don’t you just buy a 12pack and call it a day? Instead of buying two Natty Daddy’s at a time. They’re 25oz cans as well.
My coworkers are mostly great. And my bosses have worked with me to give me the days off I need and to keep me around, but I just don’t want to do it anymore. Homecoming is in less than two weeks and my stomach is in knots over it because I really don’t want to work a big college weekend again. I didn’t go to college to let myself be stuck in this kind of job. A bank job may not be what I want to do with my life, but at least I would be doing something that not only looks better, but it’s more professional. Maybe I’d even learn a thing or two about money that I didn’t know before. After all, this job I have now taught me more about beer that I never knew before.
I just think it’s time, I’m not happy when I go into work. Like I said, it’s not the people. I just don’t know how I’m going to break it to my managers that I’m done. They want me to be there forever (despite me saying not going to happen). And I did say I’d probably stay there until I moved to the city. But the city is going to have to wait, and unfortunately, I can’t keep waiting. So I think I may tell them something along the lines of, “It’s not you, it’s the job.” Breaking up. Goodbye, time to find my path in life again.
My problem is, I worry about other people’s expectations of me. I hate disappointing. And I feel obligated to stay and help out, but I need to remember that this is not my problem and I don’t have to feel stuck anymore. I have a right to my own choices, and I know they’ll respect that. I’ll give my two-weeks and do everything proper, and they can’t hate me for that.
I know this post was a tad bit longer winded than I intended it to be (I can’t type less than 1,000 words it seems). But I’m motivated! There’s a few weeks of September left, and I’m going to make a few more realistic goals:
- Officially get my physical
- Take my permit’s test
- Get a new job (fingers crossed)!
- Finish Game of Thrones book 1
I think these can be easily accomplished within a few weeks, right? I wanted to add a goal for photography, but I think I may try to hold off until October to get myself more involved in that. I want to figure out what I’m doing, where I’m going. I have a feeling the next two weeks are going to be a little rough. So I’m going to keep it simple!